Book: Growing Up Social by Gary Chapman

Growing up social by Gary Chapman & Arlene Pellicane - Children

Growing Up Social: Raising Relational Kids in a Screen Driven World.

How is social media influencing the dynamics within your family?
Do digital devices foster closeness or create distance?

While we may all know the right answer, we acknowledge the immense challenge of resisting the pervasive digital era we live in. In a world that is constantly rushing, it becomes incredibly convenient to momentarily occupy a child with a screen, enabling us to attend to household chores, cooking, and the demands of daily life.

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Instagram’s New Tool to Protect Teenagers

Instagram

Instagram announced several new features to protect teenagers.

One of the more intriguing changes will be the inability of adults to direct message (DM) teenagers (users under 18 years old) who don’t follow them. If an adult tries to DM a teenager who does not follow them, they will be shown a “You can’t message this account unless they follow you” prompt. Teenagers will be shown safety notices when messaging adults they do not follow.

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Increased youth suicide rates linked to Netflix ’13 Reasons Why’

Study associating youth suicide with Netflix '13 reasons why'
Study associating youth suicide with Netflix ’13 reasons why’ – Image: Beth Dubber/Netflix

Two separate studies were released assessing the monthly suicide rates among various age groups with the release of the Netflix show ’13 Reasons Why’. The popular Netflix show depicted the suicide of its main protagonist which had alarmed mental health experts who were concerned about how this may influence and it’s effect on young viewers. The first study found that the suicide rate among 10 to 17-year-olds boys increased significantly in the month after the release and remained higher for the subsequent 2 months. They found no significant changes in the suicide rates among older age ranges. The second study, conducted by a separate team, came to the same conclusion. In the 3 months after the Netflix show’s release, youth suicide rate for 10 to 19-year-olds rose by 13%. This study was done on both male and female youths.

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Limiting screen time or parenting screen time?

The New Childhood by Jordan ShapiroThe overuse of technology has overtaken drugs, sex and bullying as the biggest parental worry, according to the annual Brigham Young and Deseret News American Family Survey.

So what should we do about it? Should we limit screen time? Take away their phones?

Jordan Shapiro, a Temple University professor’s suggest something different. In his new book, The New Childhood, his argument is that we’re not spending enough screen time with our kids. “One of the things I suggest in the book is that kids should be starting on social media much younger,” he says. And, play more video games with your kids, too.

After Shapiro’s divorce, he found himself solo parenting two little boys (now 11 and 13) who were obsessed with video games. He started playing the games simply as a way to connect with them… He came to realize that part of his job as a parent was to help his children make sense of their online experiences and teach them how to uphold enduring values in the new world they are living in.

Check out the book here: https://amzn.to/2sSTxM3

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Apple’s Screen Time app to help curb screen addiction

Apple Screen Time iPhone Addiction

Apple’s Screen Time to Help iPhone Addiction

At the latest WWDC 2018 Conference, Apple announce a few upcoming iOS 12 apps to help curb our iPhone screen addiction. Screen addiction and it’s negative affects on both children and adults is widely documented. It’s also not as well known that many tech execs including Steve Jobs severely limited their own kids from using their own devices due to it’s addictive effects.

The new Apple Screen Time App will allow you to see how much time you are spending on your iPhone and what you apps you are spending time on. It will also allow parents to limit their children’s use of apps by putting specific time limits for individual apps. For example you can put an hour limit on Facebook or an hour limit on Snapchat or a game app. You can also designate “downtime” where the device will be blocked and can only be used if they request permission. Of course you can do it for yourself as well!

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New teen study shows more phone use leads to unhappiness

Anti-social teenagers on phones

New study on teenager phone usage and unhappiness

A new study on teen smartphone usage from San Diego State University showed that teens who spent more time on their smartphones were markedly unhappier. Professor Jean M. Twenge, Gabrielle Martin and W. Keith Campbell analyzed data of a survey given to more than a million U.S. 8th, 10th, and 12th graders. This survey asked the youth about their phone, tablet and computer usage as well as various questions about their happiness, relationships and social interactions. The study showed that teens who spent more time on the screen, whether playing games, browsing the internet, using social media, or watching videos, were considerably less happy than those who spend more time playing sports, reading books or participate in other face to face social activities.

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Teen Cyberbullying on the Internet [Infographic]

The Parents Guide to Bullying

The truth about bullying, how it effects your child, and what you can do to help.

Some sobering statistics from the infographic:

  • 85% of bullying occurs inside of school
  • 82% with learning disabilities have been bullied at school
  • 70% of student say bullying is a problem at their school
  • 44% middle schoolers experience bullying problems
  • 43% of kids have been bullied online
  • 1 in 10 students drop out of school due to repetitive bullying.
  • yet… 80% of bullying acts aren’t reported to parents
  • 43% of kids were bullied while online
  • 35% of kids have been threatened online
  • yet… 58% who experience cyberbullying have not told their parents or an adult

Results in:

  • 14% of high school students have considered suicide
  • … 7% have attempted it

 

Know the warning signs:

It’s important that we all understand that it’s very possible that bullying could be occurring without our notice. Below are some “warning signs” that are recommended from the infographic. However note that these signs are just potential signs and it’s also important to not assume things or overanalyze behavior that is often just common to teens. One advice is to just be involved in their lives, know what’s going on, what is stressing them, what makes them happy so that communicate stays open.

  • disconnects from people and isolates self
  • physical problems such as headaches and stomachaches
  • difficulty concentrating
  • difficult falling/staying asleep or experience frequent nightmares
  • seems listless, unenthusiastic and disinterested in many aspects of life
  • hyper vigilant, extremely nervous, depressed or emotionally explosive

Teen Bullying and Cyberbulling Guide

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More Advertising Leading to More E-Cigarette Use Among Teens

E-cigarettes - Vaping by Teens

Did you know that almost 7 in 10 middle and high school students are exposed to e-cigarette ads. E-cigarettes are now the most popular tobacco product among children. E-cigarette advertising dollars have risen from $6.4 million in 2011 to $115 million in 2014. In high school the use of e-cigarettes in the previous 30 days have gone from 1.5% to 13.4% during that timeframe.

A 2015 study in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine found that teens who saw a e-cigarettes ad on TV were 43% more likely to say they would try e-cigarettes than were teens who did not see the ads.

“It is unacceptable that e-cigarette advertising remains unrestricted,” American Heart Assn. Chief Executive Nancy Brown said in a statement. “Kids are encountering these ads virtually everywhere – in stores, online, in newspapers and magazines, and on television and in movies. And the sad truth is, it’s working.”

“The U.S. Surgeon General has found that tobacco and nicotine are not safe, and nicotine negatively impacts adolescent brain development and has been associated with lasting cognitive and behavioral impairments, including effects on working memory and attention in youth.”

E-cigarette Teen Use - Advertising

In a survey of 41,551 high school students in 377 schools around the country, 8th and 10th graders were twice as likely to have used e-cigarettes in the past 30 days then regular cigarettes. Not only do these e-cigarettes come in fun flavors like cotton candy and apple pie, it’s popularity may have been spurred by popular perception among teens that e-cigarettes do not harm their health. For example among 8th graders, only 15% viewed e-cigarettes to be harmful for them versus 62% believed regular cigarettes had harmful effects.

E-cigarette advertising is still not regulated. This has to change.

Everyone should be mindful that that e-cigarettes are very prevalent both in high school and in middle school. E-cigarettes do not leave the smell of “smoke” thus it would be easy for parents to be unaware of it’s use by their children. It is also important that parents educate their children on how harmful nicotine is to their brain development.

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The Impact of the It Can Wait Campaign on Teen Driving Culture

Texting & Driving Teens Danger

Major mobile carriers like AT&T, Sprint, T-Mobile and Verizon have banded together, spending millions to convince teens not to use their services, according to The Dallas News. The powerful It Can Wait campaign urges teens (and drivers of all ages) to wait until they get to their destination before reading, writing or sending text messages. According to Distraction.gov, drivers are twice as likely to crash if they are texting while in motion.

The campaign’s adverts depict gut wrenching stories in an aim to save lives. One ad tells the story of a driver who hit and killed three Amish youngsters after texting “I love you” to his wife. Another features an 8 year old who lost his legs after being hit by a texting driver. These shock-worthy tales are changing the driving culture, making it socially unacceptable to text and drive.

The Documentary

One of the first facts to scroll across the screen in the 35-minute It Can Wait documentary: 100,000 people die each year due to texting and driving. The documentary has been viewed by more than 2.7 million people since it was first uploaded to YouTube in August.

However, the first story in the film is not about someone who died as a result of texting and driving. Instead, the film details the tragic story of Xzavier, an eight year old, who has been living incapacitated since he was hit by a texting driver as a toddler. The documentary expands on the ideas in the ads, and by getting deeper into the reality victims face every day, it has an impact on teens.

Integration of Social Media

Part of the effectiveness of the It Can Wait is that it goes beyond simple TV adverts. By inviting teens to get involved, the movement has gained a larger, more effective reach than it would have without cross-platform engagement. Teens can upload their stories to the It Can Wait website through short videos, take the It Can Wait Pledge on Facebook or Tweet their stories using the dedicated It Can Wait hashtag.

Texting_While_Driving_iphoneIncreased Parental Involvement

According to the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, traffic accidents continue to be the No. 1 killer of teens, but in an effort to change this grim fact, parents have become more active in encouraging kids to wear seat belts and to never text while driving. Parents have also realized the importance of ensuring their teen drivers understand the rules of the road before they get behind a wheel and are focusing on finding free resources for practice tests and safety guides.

Safety apps have also sprung up as part of the cultural response. DriveMode, an app created by AT&T, can be set before a driver starts the car. As the teen drives toward their location, the app reads their texts aloud to them. This allows teens to quench their social curiosity without becoming a danger to others.

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How Facebook can Hurt Teen’s Chances for College

Facebook LogoDid you know that last year, Facebook changed the minimum age requirement for joining Facebook to 13 years old?

Yet a survey in 2012 showed that 38% of children on Facebook were actually under 13. In fact over 5 million users were under 10 years old!

So what’s the big deal? Teens are at a time in their neural development where they are more likely to take risks and not consider the full reach of the consequences. According to the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, the still-growing teenage brain causes teens to engage in risky behavior and act impulsively. It is no different in their user of social media. Ok so, they post a few bad pictures up on the web or they say inappropriate or explicit “teen” things on the web, what has that got to do with college?

Are Colleges looking at Social Media?

The application process for college has always been extremely competitive. Good grades and high SAT scores matter a lot, but so does extracurricular activities, a great essay, world experiences and so on. But with so many similar applicants and rising competitiveness, it is becoming more commonplace for admission officers to visit social media sites in order to gain additional information on their applicants. With the growth of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram among many social media outlets, teenagers are laying out their lives all over the net making it easier for admission officers (and in the future, job interviewers) to get a deeper look into a person’s character. In a recent 2013 survey of admissions officers by Kaplan Test Prep, they found 31 percent of the admission officers visited an applicant’s Facebook or social networking page. This is a whopping 3x more than in 2008.

Social Media Documents Everything

Unlike their parents, when teens make poor decision in life, often it is marked on the internet forever. It doesn’t simply disappear like it did for past generations. One bad picture or comment can haunt them for a long time. Teens need to be careful and recognize that what they do now can have repercussions for many years to come. Simply posting and deleting a image from Facebook or other online medium does not mean it is gone forever. It still can get picked up on the web, get caught in cache, stored in social media company servers, or copied by other readers.

Of course social media isn’t evil in itself. if your social media presence shows you are an upstanding individual with many awards and good extracurricular involvement, it can be for your benefit.

Related Post: Internet Accountability for Children

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Sobering Cyberbulling Statistics [Infographic]

Sobering Cyber Bullying Statistics

1 in 6 teens are cyberbullied.

Teens who are cyberbullied are 3,5x more likely to attempt suicide than those who aren’t bulled.

Cyberbullying is defined as the “willful and repeated harm inflicted through the use of computers, cell
phones, and other electronic devices.” Currently 80% of teens are on cell phones and on social media sites giving them the almost unhindered ability to communicate with one another for good or bad. The most sobering of them all is the higher likelihood of suicide from those cyberbullied than those who are not, or even bullied off-line. Check out this cyberbulling infographic below.

cyberbullying online infographic

More Cyberbullying Thoughts

Cyberbullying is a real problem that often goes unnoticed by parents. We all remember our childhood and the cruelty the young are capable of. Just imagine the same thing played out online where users can be anonymous and the stage is not just 1 or 2 kids but the entire school. In previous studies some have shown that 1 in 4 kids have been targets of cyberbullying and 2 of 3 teens have witnessed cruel behavior online. Yet only 10% of parents are aware that their own teens are on the receiving end of these cyberbullying behaviors. This cannot happen.

Cyberbullying Statistics

  • 1 in 6 (16.2%) of teens are cyber bullied [22.1% girls / 10.8% boys]
  • 18.6% of white [25.9% girls / 11.8% boys]
  • 8.9% of blacks [11% girls / 6.9% boys]
  • 13.6% of hispanics [18% girls / 9.5% boys]
  • 15.5% of 9th graders [22.6% girls / 8.9% boys]
  • 18% of 10th graders [24.2% girls / 12.6% boys]
  • 16% of 11th graders [19.8% girls / 12.4% boys]
  • 15% of 12th graders [21.5% girls / 8.8% boys]

Off-line bullying rates

  • 1 in 5 are bullied offline [22% girls / 18% boys]

Top 15 Highest Cyberbullying Rates by State

  1. New Hampshire [21.6%]
  2. Maine [19.7%]
  3. South Dakota [19.6%]
  4. Montana [19.2%]
  5. Indiana [18.7%]
  6. Wyoming [18.7%]
  7. Louisiana [18%]
  8. Michigan [18%]
  9. Kentucky [17.4%],
  10. North Dakota [17.4%]
  11.  Idaho [17%]
  12. Arkansas [16.7%]
  13. Utah [16.6%]
  14. Wisconsin [16.6%],
  15. Iowa [16.8%],

Current Cyberbullying Laws

  • 49/50 states have bullying laws (Montana does not)
  • 47/50 include electronic harassment.
  • 44/50 include school sanctions.
  • 18/50 specifically include “cyberbullying”
  • 12/50 include criminal sanctions.

cyberbullying childCyberbulling and Suicide Correlations

  • Teenagers who are cyberbullied are 3 times more likely to commit suicide.
  • Teenagers who are traditionally bullied are 2 times more likely to commit suicide.

Suicide attempts that require treatment:

  • 1.5% for youths not bullied
  • 2.3% for youths physically bullied
  • 5.4% for youths cyberbullied
  • 6% for youths physically and cyberbullied
  • Only 1/10 victims ask their parents for help.
  • Leaving 9/10 to deal with the abuse alone.

Tips for Parents against Cyberbulling

Tips for Educators against Cyberbulling

  • Teach that cyberbullying is wrong.
  • Listen and respond to all reports of bullying.
  • Have students work on projects against cyberbullying.
  • Have a system for complaints to be documented.
  • Host speakers on the topic of bullying.
  • Ensure that school is a safe place; free from cyberbullying.

Chime In: What Cyberbulling Statistic is the most Sobering to you?

  • Have you or your children ever been targets of cyberbulling?
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